Merry Christmas!!!! So its been a long while since I have made a post...but im back now so look out for new post

I LOST MY COMPOSITION BOOK TODAY...ITS ALL BAD! MY PIECES, MY SHORTS, MY RANDOM THOUGHTS COULD BE ANY WHERE. ITS ALL LOST FOREVER. I HOPE IT TURNS UP....FROWNS

ON A DIFFERENT NOTE:

THIS EVERYDAY FIGHT IS BEGINNING TO BE TOO MUCH. IM BEGINNING TO LOSE HOPE. LOSE STRENGTH, COURAGE, CONFIDENCE, SIGHT OF GOALS, AND MUCH MORE.

IM SO TIRED AND DRAINED. RIGHT NOW IT DOESNT SEEM WORTH IT AT ALL. I HAVE NO BACK UP AND IT SEEMS EVERYONE AROUND ME IS FALLING OFF THE WAGON. IM ON THIS JOURNEY ALL ALONE NOW. SIGHZ

the beauty of midnight

realizing the beauty of things.

in particular the midnight sky.

looking up at the sky in a mix of blue, black, and gray;

with silent shimers of stars.

and ever so perfect the moon stands in the middle of it all

much like the calm within peace.

no clouds to mask the sky's fairness.

tenderly kissed by the moon's glow,

embraced by the graceful gust of wind

silence other than the whisper of very distant car

never have i been so alone but felt so surrounded

facing the universe as it is

a chaotic portrait

painted to depict peace

Poem "Yesturday's News"

Yesterday’s news

The way you make me feel
You make me feel___ sad
My high spirit shot down
By cupids arrow
See cupids arrow shot me
And the arrow pierced my heart
But the arrow was too sharp and it
Penetrated through and broke my heart

See it was suppose to make me fall in love
But the arrow was tainted
So instead of loving you, I hated you
Just the thought of you makes me cringe
So how could I love yesterday’s news

See the butterflies I had in my stomach from you died
It seemed they turned into acid now I burning inside
See what you have down
I thought I was having fun
See I fell so deep
Deeper than deep
But can you see
I fell so deep in shallow water
See you didn’t feel the way I did
Its like I took a bid

See when I was with you I knew
But I was hiding from the true
As I hid from the true in you
I left myself in a vulnerable state
And this was never up for debate
I knew you didn’t care about me as I did you
I used to call to you my boo
See what you made me do
I’m not angry at you I’m angry at myself
You’re just another on my self
See you’re like a little girl’s doll
She plays with you and toys with you
But when she’d tired of you she gets rid of you

I would throw you away like yesterdays news _ but_
I was mesmerized by you

im back yo!

hey readers and or fellow bloggers. Im back...and check me out for new post.

sorry fellow bloggers...i have been off line for a while, underground taken care of some business. kinda went phantom for a while trying to sort some things out. but im back and stay tuned for up coming post

Oh so true

busy week

Sorry reader(s)...i have been a little busy this past week.
I started school and it is was kind of messy. my schedule is all messed up. i plan to get that fixed tomorrow. But now isnt the time to complain. Stay tuned for more post this coming week.

Back 2 Basics

today was just one of those days where i just wanted to be a kid again. i just wanted to be in ignorance bliss without a care in the world. i want my biggest worries to be what to bring to show and tell and not rejection from another job. i wanted go back to kindergarden where i could express myself in finger paints and it wouldnt be called abstract. i want to have nap time and a bed time. i want to be in a kids place where stress isnt a option. where bills dont seem to exist but u just know the lights, gas, phone etc is on and dont realize that it takes money to keep those things on. go back to the days where only the world you encounter is the world that exist...where war is just a fight and conflict between super heros on tv. back to watching cartoons on ktla after school...you know...pinky and the brain,and bobby's world or what about kcet...sesame street, bananas in pajamas, lamb chops...or nick...algeras window, gulla gulla island...man can i just have one day? maybe its best i dont go back...but how i wish i could just for a little while.

Calm Before The Storm

It was the night of the 14th of this month, and it was about 1 am in the morning. For some reason i decided to go out side at this hour at when i walked outside...it was this stillness in the atmosphere. Never had i experienced a moment like this... it was lightening with no thunder, the night wasnt hot nor cold, there was not even a slight gust of wind. the fact that there was absolutely no sound, was deafing. and to live in the inner city and not hear not one car creeping on the road was almost scary. and to look up at the sky to see blues, blacks and grays mix in the sky like a portrait of confusion that created such a mural of peace. i looked to the clouds and the connecting bolts of lightening and the pure moon...i, in that moment, awaited to see God's face. this encounter left me speechless and in a daze....and i knew for a fact that this was the calm before the storm.

And knowing this was the calm before the storm, i awaited for the storm and the storm came. Saturday morning came, and with it....death was at the door. Two women of God was called on home that i knew. And though, morbid as this could be, it is the storm much after the calm.

one bad interview!

i realized that if you were to interview me as a poet...
that would be a boring interview!
yeah ppl say i write good even great poems...
but if you were to ask me, what was going thru my head, what was going on when i wrote the poem, what inspired the poem....i honestly couldnt tell you
its like when i write, i just write and mold a poem from the random words later!!!
it doesnt take an inspiration to write most of my poems...weird i know!

My People

Ode to My People
Oh hail, to my black people
oh they tried to brake you and make your mind feable
your mind regenerated and you are stronger now more than ever
in this broken nation your are its heart unsevered

for a long time, you struggled to find your place
and always woke up with heart ache in your face
and you merely gave it a kiss
cause that was your way of appearing ignorance bliss

oh hail, my strapping black brotha'
that took blows from masta' one afta' anotha'
they tried to destroy you by any means necessary
their tactics to obliterate you is televised and known as legendary

knowing you have strength like none other
aroused the minds of your oppressor
and since then they planned for your demise
but oh! one day you will rise

oh hail to my strong black sista'
who has fought despite being bludgeoned by circumstance
and for a long time coming shown condemnation
but still in all, stood as the back bone just to see your man advance

oh hail to my black brothas and sistas!!!!

His Story Told!!!!

Misery
he cant feel but powerless
to the embrace of misery
the shackles of oppression
and faint characatures of the midnight deary
left for dead even though his soul lived
only wish one could say that for his heart
the fragrance of defeat loomed in the air
as the stinch of bliss and geniune ecstasy was bound and lost
he knew no love but all to familar with hatrid
and on his lips he would savor his last breath
and then he expired
cause of death...
choked by the threads of passion
and suffocated by his own words that bled from his heart
he went grotesquely and in surging pain
he went with the forlorn anguish and heavy heartedness
went feeling rejected from the womb of prosperity
and he left the world petrified that he wasnt loved
and that he would indeed be forgotten
and so he was
his greatest fears became reality
misery took him far too soon
before i could reach him
and to witness the sight of his stiff carcass with crusted tears
and to remember i heard his last words whisper
in the shrud air and nothing but the smell of misery remained

NON SENSE WRITING!!!!

first let me explain what non sense writing is...its when u jot down what ever comes to mind
it could be just a word, a sentence fragment or a complete sentence...doesnt matter...only thing is just dont stop writing! and when u dont know what to write next u repeat that last word over and over until something else comes to mind....try it some times!!! i find it helps during writers block! you never know where it would lead....so here i go and i hope u try this sometime....most certainly good for poets!!!!!

beat beat beat take a seat listen listen listen to the words that i speak
what are you in search of what do u seek seek sought i sought after what i couldnt grasp
piece of mind broken in shards shards shards shards/ scratch claw at the surface drill into the marrow and find the truth within/ breaking the molds of conformance and the cast of assimilation.....

thats just a demo but u should get the gist of it...
and when i read what i wrote a see a potiential poem in the making

NO CLUE WHAT IM DOING!

i realized that i have no clue what im doing in this thing called life!

each step i take is a surprise to me

every movement is uncontrolled

every moment is unexpected

every breath is my first

ever lasting suspense

first day to the rest of my life!

TODAY is the first day to the rest of my life!!!!

im going to the next level now, im talking spiritually. its time to put away all my childish things, rid of anything that can lead to my demise. the word of God says "when i was a child i spoke as a child..." now i have grown in the body of Christ. my faith will never be compromised, never will i let anyone or anything question my faith. i say faith not religion because religion, in my opinion, provides answers to all questions asked; where as faith is your trust in God without total understanding. what im saying is "walk by faith not by sight".

Master Divinity

For you i would give up my child
my body i would defile
give it to me, until i say no more
you gave me what i want and forever i will adore

you are an uncontrollible temptation
your strength- i crave
your power, an idol, a fixation
alas i have become your slave

i need you like non other
cocaine...i lust for you to my core
you got me so high i cant get sober
why cant i have more?

i have fallen under your sovereignty
you're my one and only zeal
you have become my divinity
to have you i would kill

i wrote this as an english assignment. its pains me to say that cocaine and other drugs do become peoples addictions to the point they in a sense reverence the drug itself. even as the writer of this poem it was hard to stomach because it told a story of so many drug addicts, some close to home. if i had known this poem would be so morbid and depressing i would have probably never wrote it. however, im glad i did.